Sunday, August 22, 2010
"Your soul is the real you! Therefore, if you can identify with the desires of the soul, it will satisfy the needs of the real you...The ultimate desire of the soul is to live fully, vibrantly with every fiber of your being to do what's meaningful, what's right, what's productive."
Rabbi Kalman Packouz
Now that is it over 4 weeks since my surgery in Los Angeles, it is time for me to start my life again. I am feeling good, strong, and in-balance although I tire easily.
Friday I got a brainstorm to take a VB programming course at the local community college. I started out at 9:30 AM by first getting my residency certificate so that I could get a cheaper rate. Then I went down to the college to apply and register. The application lady would not accept me because she didn't see English 101 and no online copy of my transcripts. (I had taken many courses there before!) So I had to sit and wait for special permission from an advisor. She then registered me in the course and then I had to wait in line to pay for the course, buy my very expensive book and get my ID and parking pass. I needed my car registration for the parking pass so I had to walk back to the car. I moved the car closer to the building where I needed to get the parking pass. Still I was tired. I then stopped at the pharmacy to buy a notebook and pick up a prescription. Of course, there had been problems with the prescription and it wasn't ready so I left. I stopped to by a sub at the local Subway and I finally got home at 2:30 PM. A long day, but I start my class tomorrow.
The cat is really sick. I have a vet appointment for him on Wednesday, but I might have to get him in early. It will cost more, but his face is all swollen from ulcers. He had one last week, but it was small and healing so I thought that there was no rush. But yesterday Mike and I noticed a second one, quite large and today his face is swollen. I hope this is not the end for Snowball. He is fifteen and although I will miss him, if getting his teeth fixed won't heal him, I will have to put him down. I will call Ron and Kimberly if I have to do that.
I have been applying for jobs online, but the market is slow. I probably will have to work out of town for awhile. I miss having money and having to scrimp and scrape to get by. I do enjoy the slower pace of my life - plenty of time to think and do little errands. Unfortunately, I spend too much time in front of the TV! I am hoping that the VB course will break that habit.
What is meaningful, right and productive for my life still lacks form. I keep searching but it eludes me. More time in meditation would help, but it is so hard to still the mind. I find that I don't think too much about the past, but I am constantly trying to plan my future. Some planning is necessary but not when I am trying to meditate!
Rosalind 3:08 PM
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